What’s the vibe this week? (April 5 - April 11)

I’m starting out the week on a less than stellar note. Yesterday I got really overwhelmed by just the avalanche of work that I had done last week. Ended up deciding that mentally I just couldn’t handle completing the last few small school assignments I had left to do and dropped them. The stress of the week and this entire situation with COVID-19 and beginning to grapple with the reality that things are going to be like this for a long time to come just got to me.

I’ve also been dealing with a weird stomach bug. Lots of trips to the bathroom and some uncomfortable abdominal pain. It’s only been two nights (Friday and tonight) and only after I’ve eaten dinner, so I’m hoping maybe my stomach is just a little sensitive right now. Originally I thought maybe it was just something I ate on Friday that didn’t sit well, but since it happened again tonight I’m worried it is a persistent thing. Gonna try eating safe bland foods for a few days and see where I end up. I would really like to not have to go see my doctor right now as I know they’re probably busy.

I have dealt with mysterious stomach/digestion issues before. In 2017 I went through a period of like two months eating only white rice and plain bread because anything else would put me in extraordinary pain. Ended up getting a colonoscopy that turned out totally normal. In 2018, right after I graduated, I had abdominal pain that we thought was appendicitis (had a CAT scan that turned out normal) and kidney stones (had an ultrasound, also normal). I was between doctors at the time until I landed with my current one around the 2018 stuff. She ultimately said that it sounded like both times I was incredibly stressed with schoolwork and it was affecting my body. So it would fit that that’s what’s happening right now. I think I have to be real with myself (and maybe my professors if it comes to that) that my mental health is the most important thing and I cant compromise that for schoolwork. I know my professors would be understanding, but I push myself so hard when it comes to school and I hate crapping out on things. Part of it too is just finding healthy ways to cope with stress, but some of that is accepting that sometimes you just gotta drop things from the to do list.